From last Wednesday to about today I’ve been sick. Not the type of sick that you can brush off – but the sick that makes it hard to think and function like a human being. The type of sick that made me think of posting a picture of my kleenex box for Thankful Thursday, until I realized how much effort that would require.
Tonight was a member’s night at church, and it was one of those times when I felt it was time for me to get back on the horse. Not just in the sense of being a human being this week (unlike last week), but in being a human being with thoughts, passions, and pursuits for life, people, and God.
Even though I was only sick for about a week – that week combined with the message tonight highlighted how easy it is to get off track. It starts with a day here, and week there. Soon the vision that is throughout the New Testament seems fuzzy and the to-do list at work more attractive and more obtainable. More often I check my email more than I say a prayer about what God would have me do. That isn’t a legalistic remark – it just shows what is at my heart and priorities.
I know it sounds hokey – but I pray that God would change my heart. I want to want the mission of Christ, and to believe that following is more attractive, more daring, more rewarding than what anything else may have to offer. I want others to be able to see a difference in my life, but not because I want them to like me or admire me – but that they would also start to wonder about Christ.
These are large, weighty desires – but the ones that make me feel like I was realigned tonight. As I was shaken up and turned upside down, I once again see my need for God more clearly.